Melissa’s Period Truth
[Originally shared August 31, 2020]
Being Better fam, meet another woman standing in her truth with bravery and honesty. Her name is Melissa Khoeum Barnett, and she’s my cousin, family by blood and one of my first real friends growing up! By day she works as a project manager, and by night she finds joy in being a beauty blogger under the name of Melissa Self Care, where she breaks down all things beauty, including skincare that works best for you throughout the changes of the month that you may or may not notice. I hope you enjoy as Melissa bares all here: this is her Period Truth.
What was your first period like? How did it make you feel?
Honestly, I don’t remember my first period but I do remember feeling relieved. Most of my friends got their periods in Middle School. I was a late bloomer and didn’t get it until High School. I remember thinking to myself am I weird? What if I don’t get it? And then I got it. Haha!
What was your education about your period like? Who told/taught you?
My mom never really talked about it with me. All I remember was that once I got it she told me “I am a women now and I can’t mess up now” in Khmer (Cambodian language). Then pads started showing up in the restrooms. That was the end of the convo. For all I knew, since I got my period, if I looked at a boy I could get pregos. Funny looking back at it. It does brings me back to High School memories of how much of a nerd I was. All I thought about was, ‘I can’t get prego I gotta go to college.’
What has been the impact on your health, outlook in life, or self-connection (based on the sex education you received or lack thereof)?
Looking back I think I was pretty mature for my age. I didn’t have much sex education. I remember thinking that I didn’t want to have sex unless I was ready mentally for the emotional attachment that I would or would not have with the guy, and also thought to myself ‘am I ready for the responsibility of a baby.’ I’m a Scorpio (not that that matters) but I really like to be in control of my feelings. It’s impacted my life in the way I was some-what a late bloomer when I lost my virginity. I really mentallity prepared myself for this milestone in my life and the rest is Herstory.
How do you feel about your period now that you’ve taken part in Period Truth?
Being apart of “Period Truth” has been eye opening. It made me realize culturally as a Cambodian-American these are topics our community doesn’t really talk about. I’m more cautious now that if I have a daughter I’ll start these conversations with her earlier. I feel like in most cutlures “womanhood” is kind of swept under the rug and not embraced. The Period Truth has ecouraged me to embrace my womanhood.
What realizations did you have about yourself/your period that might move you to changes regarding your health and overall wellbeing?
One thing I realized is that I get really tired now when I’m on my period, but I’m starting to realize it’s not just my period, it’s my current lifestyle. I haven’t been as active this last year and my overall health is impacted. I’m trying to workout or do more active activities for my overall health.
What do you wish to share about period health, cycle syncing, period hygiene with other people who have periods and for people who don’t?
As a middle-aged woman… I think I’m technically middle-aged now... I would say I think I still have more to learn. After particiapting in Period Truth I feel like I need to do more research on periods and health. My advice right now would be to read other people’s stories on their “Period Truth.” It reveals that everyone has a unique period experience.
How do you feel your period will impact your life’s work?
Everytime I get a new job, I get a new period sync. This is just a given and I have learned to accept.
It’ll definitely impact my life’s work. One of my goals in life is to develop a skincare brand and guess what? Periods really impact a woman’s skin during their period. Some people break out, others will swell more, some lucky few will have no effect on their skin. So it’s important to incorporate these ideas when developing a product. Also, it reminds me to be kind and compassionate to working women. You have doctors saving lives, cashiers standing for hours helping people with groceries, and teachers monitoring a full classroom… who all are serving society on their periods with a smile on their faces. That’s pretty admirable.
For fun: what’s your go-to holistic period product or ritual (favorite cup, undies, tea, crystals, bath, facemasks, massage, etc.)
My favorite thing to do during my period right now is to: wear sweats, wear a face mask, grab some ice cream and watch Pen15 on Hulu. It makes me happy!
